How to Silence a Screaming Baby on a Flight

I was told, you see, my parents being very middle class when I grew up, that they used to have a bidet. What do you do about the screaming baby? Do you know what? As nobody's fault. If you're in a shop or a pub and the baby's screaming, I'm going to upset so many people here. Take the baby outside. Don't cast dirty locks because it's just going to put them on more stress. The baby picks up that stress where it's going to make the baby scream louder and cry more. We've all been there. Crying baby on a plane. Okay, on a plane, there's nothing you can do.