The Government's Emergency Helpline for Strike Days

Government has also set up an emergency helpline to cover the strike days. I've been chosen as a beta tester, actually, to make sure it's working properly. If you're already dead, press 1 for how to give a general anesthetic with a frying pan. Press 3 for how to use a sandwich toaster as a defibrillator. It's budget day next week so any parents of young children listening, be prepared for your kids to stop badgering you for a toy replica red box and a Jeremy Hunt action figure.