Sex appeal vs status: what wins loyalty

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Psychologist and relationship coach Sadia Khan joins James Smith to unpack the problem with dating apps, modern relationships, and the illusion of infinite choice. Together they explore why technology has made commitment harder, attraction more confusing and why everyone - men and women alike - are struggling to connect in an age of endless swiping.

Sadia reveals the psychology behind sex appeal, status and loyalty, explaining how dopamine, dating culture and false advice online are reshaping human relationships. From incel culture and OnlyFans to the fear of rejection and emotional detachment, this is a raw, unfiltered conversation about what’s gone wrong with love… and how to fix it.

She explains:

◼️ Why dating apps destroy genuine connection

◼️ How “too many options” kills commitment

◼️ The truth about sex appeal and attraction

◼️ Why men and women misunderstand each other online

◼️ The rise of transactional relationships in the digital age

00:00 – The Problem With People Being Single

01:48 – Three Main Problems: Options, Bad Advice & Monogamy

03:28 – Dating Apps: The Illusion of Choice

05:07 – Genetics, Status & What Women Actually Want

08:08 – The Secret Ingredient: Sex Appeal

11:19 – The Three A's: Attraction, Admiration, Adoration

13:32 – Women and Lust: The Sex Response

16:13 – Sexual Dominance vs Sexual Submission

19:30 – Anxiety Kills Sex Appeal

21:11 – OnlyFans: Manipulating Vulnerable Men

24:40 – Sex Workers and Materialistic Values

28:41 – Masturbation in Healthy Relationships

31:39 – The Sex Toy Epidemic

34:36 – Low Testosterone Nearly Ruined My Relationship

38:29 – Stress, Overtraining & Catastrophic Thinking

41:44 – Natural Ways to Boost Testosterone

44:13 – Why Genetics Matter: The TRT Debate

46:17 – Fat Acceptance vs Reality

49:38 – Why Staying Together Requires No Alternatives

51:14 – Two Types of Men: Loyal to the Woman vs Loyal to the Wife

52:35 – The Dubai Dating Scene Explained

55:34 – Why Russian Women Dominate Men in Dubai

58:38 – Escort Culture & Naive Men

1:01:12 – Corrupt Women vs Good Women

1:04:20 – The Danger of Being 39 and Single

1:08:05 – Four Things to Look For Before Having Kids

1:11:49 – Prenups: A Revealer of Character

1:15:12 – Why Your Partner Needs Financial Independence

1:18:05 – AI Relationships: Glamorizing Loneliness

1:19:22 – New Book: The 10 Red Flags

1:20:56 – Closing RemarksClaude can make mistakes. Please double-check responses.

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