The Problem of Evil in the Existence of God

When you don't know where god is in your sorrow, then pain becomes the genesis for your deconstruction. And one of the reasons you're slowly moving away from the faith is because you're hurting, and you believe god to be the cause. What do we do with suffering when there is no one to blame, and even worse, when god doesn't give a reason for it? For first and only point, i'm out your way.