Are we crushing our boys with an outdated education system?

Why do so many young men feel bored, disengaged, and misunderstood in school? What if the system isn’t broken—but just not built for them in the first place?

In this episode, we dive deep into a powerful and necessary conversation about the struggles boys face in modern education—and what one man is doing to change that. If you’ve ever felt like your son was being shaped to fit a mold that just doesn’t work for him, this one’s for you.

Meet Ben Kuiken, a former traditional teacher who asked a simple, bold question: What if we stopped trying to fix boys, and instead fixed the system?

From humble beginnings as a fifth-grade teacher to co-founding Anvil Academy, Ben has become a trailblazer in creating hands-on, purpose-driven education specifically designed for boys. With a deep belief in identity, risk, adventure, and real-world learning, Ben is on a mission to forge men—not just students.

Quotes:

"If a boy knows who they are, if they can answer why they matter, and they can say, here's the audience that I'm living for, this is who gets to write off on my report card - that prepares them for whatever season life throws their way." - Ben Kuiken
"We're preparing these kids for a world that isn't even established yet. I don't need to prepare them for a system or something. I need to be able to prepare them for anything." - Ben Kuiken
"I believe that I am an adopted son of the King of the universe, and that gives me all the value that I need - that I am unconditionally loved, that I am fully seen, all of my flaws internally and externally." - Ben Kuiken

Key Takeaways:

Reimagine Education at Home: If you're a parent or educator, ask yourself: Is my child being shaped by a system that supports who they are—or suppresses it? Begin by creating space for hands-on learning, curiosity, and risk-taking in your home or classroom.

Replace Digital Risk with Real-World Adventure: Boys naturally seek risk, challenge, and consequence. Channel that energy into real-life experiences—like sports, building projects, outdoor adventures, or creative challenges—that have tangible rewards and consequences.

Challenge the “This Is How It’s Always Been Done” Mentality: Whether in parenting, teaching, or leadership, ask: Is this method truly working—or just familiar? Be brave enough to try new approaches, even if it means pushback.

Start Small, Start Now: Inspired to make a change? Don’t wait for a perfect plan or a crowd of followers. Start with one student, one lesson, one moment of connection. Excellence at a small scale leads to meaningful impact.

Conclusion:

This conversation with Ben Kuiken reminds us that the future of young men isn’t written by grades, test scores, or outdated systems—it’s forged through identity, purpose, and real-world challenge.

Whether you’re a parent, educator, or mentor, the question now is: Are you helping the boys in your life become men—or just helping them behave?

Ben’s journey shows us what’s possible when we stop trying to force boys to fit the mold—and instead, build a world that fits their God-given design. The path won’t be easy. It’s not meant to be. But it’s worth it.

So take the first step. Be curious. Be bold. And remember—great men aren’t born. They’re forged.

The Party Crasher

Mentioned by

Mentioned in 1 episodes

The AI-powered Podcast Player